Day 4 (music: The Dissociatives)

Day 4: Something I have to forgive someone else for.

Need to pick a good one, because sadly, I do tend to hold a grudge, however, in my defense, I will say that it takes a lot to push me to the grudge-holding point.

That being said, I really should forgive Rob for not hiring me for that job at Sage. I have a really hard time not taking it personally, like I'm trying not to do. It's just hard. We're close to broke right now, which I really freaking hate, I'm job-hunting, which I also hate, and after him telling me things like "I will teach you everything I know [regarding cooking in a fine-dining establishment]," and "I really hope you get the full-time job here...You're a good person who deserves a break and I'd like to be the one to give it to you," and being so fast to fill out the application once it appeared online....

I understand that that's the nature of the industry I've chosen. I understand that the dude he hired was probably more qualified than me, even though I worked there twice and busted my freakin' ass while I was there, perfect attendance, even volunteered to work extra hours and put in 7 days straight during Hell Week.

What really burns my ass about it is that he TOLD me REPEATEDLY that he would stay in touch, that he'd let me know how the interviews were going. And I found out the position had been filled from my friend four days after the fact. Strikes me as being slightly cowardly, IMO. I can safely say I would never do that to someone.

Will I get over it? Yes. Do I miss it there? Yes. Good money for doing what I love? Of course I miss it. Does this add to my trust issues? Um, yeah. Just a little. Is there a reason in the grand scheme of things? Oh, most likely, I think I even know what it is. But we'll see. Right now I have to focus on getting another job so I can have some positive cash flow. Hopefully the one at the Grain Train - I have a couple friends who work there and it's healthy food. So we'll see.